Coach Lesson: How to SPOT a PLAYER!!

HOW TO SPOT A PLAYER

Can you spot a player? Here are tip-offs from author Neil Strauss, who spent two years spying on pick-up artists for his book The Game.

He's just playing games if ...

1. He gives you guilt trips. Says Strauss, "One guy I knew told a girl who was hesitant to go home with him, 'I thought you said you were spontaneous and a free spirit.'"

2. He's got a gimmick. Pick-up pros call this "peacocking" -- doing something outrageous to pull a woman, any woman, in. (One guy wore seven-inch platform shoes.)

3. He gives backhanded compliments, like "You kinda have man hands. But you're cute." (Actual line!). It's an attempt to make you feel insecure so you'll want to win a guy's approval -- in bed.

4. You're not sure how he feels. If you're always asking your friends whether they think a guy likes you or not, the answer is no. Don't ignore your intuition. As Strauss says, "It's your best defense against a player."

He's serious if...

1. He's happy to hand over his favorite book/CD/sweatshirt if you ask to borrow it. "A clear sign he's fully planning on seeing it -- and you -- again," says Strauss.

2. He's brought you to his favorite bar. Strauss says: "If a guy's integrating you into his daily life, then he's looking to make you a permanent part of it."

3. He returns your calls quickly. Players thrive by messing with your mind -- one guy told Strauss he let a girl leave him 12 messages before calling her back.

4. He goes to your nephew's fifth birthday party with you. "A man who sees you as just a fling is usually going to avoid situations where there's zero chance of having sex with you."

Just Asking ... Think you can you tell a player from someone who's serious? What are some of your tip-offs that he's just in it for the game?